Ho…Lee…Crap. If I wasn’t someone who gets paid a very small amount of money to keep abreast of the entertainment industry I would think one of two things: That “The Dark Knight Rises” star Christian Bale has really let himself go and has switched careers to work in the used car industry(this would make me a whimsical idiot); or that he’s staring in a biopic based on the life of any one of my dad’s white trash gambling buddies that I grew up calling “Uncle” such and such (they were great guys, don’t get me wrong, they just looked ridiculous). However, I am in fact paid a little bit of cash to know what’s going on in the movie world, so I know that these are just images of Bale in “American Hustle”, a movie that reunites him with “The Fighter” director David O. Russell and co-star Amy Adams. The film is loosely based on a real sting operation that the FBI ran in the late 1970s, and strangely enough, his character was on the good guys’ side. His OTB in 1984 look is the result of his playing a con man; if you don’t know that OTB stands for “Off Track Betting”, then you had a way better childhood than me and I don’t like your face.
So anyhow, Christian Bale usually has a full head of fancy hair, sitting atop a pretty jacked up body, but he’s going for fat and balding in this role. Seeing as how he’s the same dude who weighed about a hundred pounds soaking wet when he filmed “The Machinist”, I’m going to guess that he actually put on all that weight and that he has his head shaved and styled into whatever the hell that is, and I love it. I usually give people crap about having a comb-over, but when it’s atop a man who’s wearing those glasses and that jacket, I’m all for it. Comb-overs are bad when they’re trying to hide that someone is balding, but they’re awesome when they’re used as a legitimate hair style. This is the kind of guy who isn’t trying to hide that he’s bald, he’s trying to say “Yeah, I’m bald, so what? Who ya got in the fourth race?”. As a matter of fact, I really hope that Bale brings this haircut back with him when he returns to the action movie game. Imagine Bruce Wayne changing out of the Batsuit and getting into that getup; it would be amazing. So bald on Christian Bale, thanks for repping up well!