Category Archives: Terry Nutkins

Listen boys and girls, The Bald Master General doesn’t know everything…wait a second, I have to fact check that…yup, it’s true; I only know almost everything. One of those things I don’t know, or didn’t know until today; is who in in the bald eagle’s bongos Terry Nutkins is. Well it looks like he’s the granola chewing host of UK children’s shows like Animal Magic, The Really Wild Show, Brilliant Creatures and Growing Up Wild; but who cares. What’s really important is that he rocks the “bald on top; long on the sides” like it’s nobody’s business! This guy could give Hulk Hogan a run for his money; in the bald-cut department, not in the “saving us from Iranian rule through wrestling” department. He wears it with so much confidence; with a shiny bald spot and luxurious hair surrounding it. The man is like an artist, and according to the pictures, he’s been doing it for years. Also according to the pictures, he may be able to speak to animals ( he has so many photos with them!); like The Beast Master, only British, and with an awesome doo. I’m going to give him the rank of ‘Major’ and welcome him into the bald army…even though he’s an Englishman (*punches Buckingham Palace guard in the nards, plays sweet metal riff on air guitar, runs away while doing “U-S-A” chant*).