Tag Archives: Tom Cruise

Today we have our first ever “Battle of the Balds!”, our new feature where we put two baldies, fictional or real, and put them head to head in a war for bald supremacy. We finally answer the question that none of you are asking: Who does a random blog site think is a better bald person? Our first match-up pits two bald characters from comedy movies that are played by real life heart throbs:

Les Grossman (Tropic Thunder)

…against…

Bobby Pellit (Horrible Bosses)

Both are the angry, out of shape, and comb-overed runners of their respective fictional companies (Grossman runs a movie studio, whil Pellit runs a chemical company), and both are prone to angry outbursts. At first I was inclined to give the edge to Grossman because of his awesome display of epic chest hair (bald and hairy is almost always funnier), but then I realized something very important. I realized that Grossman is only really as entertaining as he is because he’s played by Tom Cruise, and you spend most of your time laughing because, “Holy biscuit sauce! That’s Tom Cruise!”. However, Farrell’s drug abusing, brash decision making, prostitute loving Bobby would be funny no matter who played him…except for Jay Leno…he’s only funny when…ok, he’s not funny ever. So with that, I, The Bald Master General, would like to announce that the winner via second round character development is….Bobby Pellit! Congrats fictional chracter played by someone I’ve never met, you’re the man…now dog